Merry Christmas!

Make a Smilebox slideshow

One of the Best Things in my life.

I love going to church. I want to go every Sunday. I want to teach the lords words........The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is one of the best things in my life...and i cant even do that right. I love all of my brothers and sisters at church. I wish I could be more like them. I know that Christ lives, I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet. I know that this church is true. I just wish i was able to believe in myself. I know that this is not the best way to talk to my lord but it sure makes me feel better to have my words written down. I want my family to attend church everyday. but with me i need familiar faces and my husband. After Bobby was baptised we were going to church. but once we were comfortable more familiar faces move. I know that I need to go for the lord and savior. but with me i need comfort, I do have the comfort of the Lord, but when you don't hardly know anyone you feel like the odd ball out. My two Best Friends (Erin and Rainy) in this world left. They were my rock. I didn't attend church just for them but having them around, with friends like that sure made it easier. i know that sounds stupid. Rainy: still around but has changed. Erin: mission, marriage, Texas. I know everything changes as we grow up, but I have never been the kind that liked or take change very well. I still know a couple of people there but only one that is around my age from my past always heard she didn't like me very well, never understood that because I always and still thought she was a really nice and sweet talented person. But for now I feel like I don't belong. I hate feeling this way. I need my church. I dream of going to the temple and being sealed as a family, I have never had my patriarchtical blessing. Bobby believes in it all, he just needs a little push. He is more shy than I am. He has been a member for 3 years and in that time he has never said his prayer in front of me or our kids. He can't give talks, i don't mean won't , he can't. He wants to go to listen to the lords words to try to understand them. and when one person asks him to say the pray he says no and then feels bad and can't face them anymore for awhile. And Bobby is my familiar. With Bobby as the patriarch of the family I feel I need to follow him. I need to follow my lord. I make excuses for bobby when all I want to say to him is get up and go to church, not just sacrament but classes as well. I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE!!! But at the same time I don't feel worthy. Look Bobby and I has lived together and had a child out of wed lock. I regret that, but not my daughter. I wish I would have done things different. but I didn't and know I have to feel this way for the rest of my life. I can say that we don't smoke, do drugs, or drink so we do have that going for us. I just now need to do more with my life especially now. Since 2006 I have personally be diagnosed with diabetes, non alcoholic fatty liver disease, high blood pressure, and just recently had MRSA which put me out of commission for awhile. Still fighting with the diabetes but has almost beaten the liver disease and high blood pressure. I do pray with my children every night i just wish Bobby would pray and attend church with us. I live by the word of wisdom except i don't pay my tithing like I should. Please Heavenly Father Help me and my family.

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

October 21, 2008

Okay so today is my little boy's birthday. It is hard to believe it. For the last couple of months we have asked what would he like...... he has always replied with "2 Cars". He is a car man.....just like his daddy. I do wish he would get interested in other things but cars is what he likes. He had so much fun. We just stayed home and had him a little party but he really enjoyed him self. And of course every one just about got him "2 cars". he had 20 by the end of the day. Where does time GO! Just yesterday he was in my arms needing me for every little movement in his life. now his getting around and even has friends in his life that he wants to spend time with more than his own family.....and he's 4 years old.

Conquering a fear (a mini one)

okay so most of my friends know I my fears both big and small. You also know where i work. well if you can't tell by the picture.lol. Well I could never stick my finger in my eye! Just couldn't. Notice:....I said COULDN'T.... well now I can. It has been a week since i started wearing Contacts. I Love Them!! I have been where glasses for 2 years now. Glasses are OK, but man when I put on these contacts my vision is soooooo much sharper and clearer. I can not believe it has taken me this long to work myself up just to wear contacts. And.....Aannd.....it wasn't that bad at all. Yes a little extra work but i can handle that.

My Most Hated Disease!!!

So If any of you know what this is......then you have or know someone who has diabetes. I hate this thing. however it is my life line. After 2 years I still can NOT prick my fingers. I am thankful that I don't not have to take insulin. I definitely can't do that.. no way....no how. And even after 2 years diabetes still scare me. I have family members who are really have trouble with it and have had thing amputated. And I have to admit, sugar is my weakness and I am having trouble staying away from it. but my A1c test is still down. GO FIGURE! I guess it would help if my family didn't want me to buy the stuff for them. At the same time it's expensive to buy healthy. I know, I know...No excuses. I will try to be better.

Dinners

Bobby don't really like my cookin'. He states "It's not like momma makes it". Well momma lives 1 min away from us go eat there. But Monday knight I made some steaks and he loved them. He even took the left overs to a friend and he states he would buy that steak in a restaurant. I can't believe Bobby finally likes something other than my taco's for dinner. I thought it was good as well, the kids.....well they would rather have chicken nuggets.

Bobby and I

Bobby and I met in Dec. 1997, Started dating in Feb. 1998. We were livin' together for 2 years before we had our daugther, Tatum Nicole. Yes we were un wed. That's the one thing I do regret, is that we were not married, but I will never regret my daughter. She is the most important girl in my life. How can you love something so much before it's here.

So in 2001, Bobby and I got married and bought a house, and just 3 years later we had Jayden Avery. And so here we are today......we are a simple family.

Meet Jayden Avery

Okay this Is Jayden Avery, he is who I call "My Buddy". Jayden was born he weighed just 9 lbs 5 oz. When he was 6 wks old he weighted 8lbs 1 oz. After many unanwsered doctors visits I took Jay to a walk in clinic, where i felt alot better with his dignosis. He has Pyloric Stenosis.

What Is Pyloric Stenosis? You Say.......
Pyloric stenosis is a narrowing of the pylorus, the lower part of the stomach through which food and other stomach contents pass to enter the small intestine. When an infant has pyloric stenosis, the muscles in the pylorus have become enlarged to the point where food is prevented from emptying out of the stomach.

So in my opinion my kids so called doctor misdiagnosed my son and he almost died. Now I know my son had a medical problem but in my hearts of hearts I know that , that doctor didn't do the the best he could to help my son. I do however what to give kudos to the Nurse Practitioner, Kelley Sharp. She took the time to listen to me and care for my son. I owe her everything. I know it's not my place to judge and that it's the Lords job but I will never let my children go back to that that doctor. I trust a Nurse before I would trust that doctor again. Needless to say 48 hours later my son had his surgery and is alot better.

But now Jayden is 3 years old going on 4. He is a ladies man, He has gotten my grandmother eating out of the palm of his hand. Which my grandmother was with me during the whole pyloric thing. She watch as he cryed for me when they took 2 hours just to put an iv in him, but not one tear fell from his checks. Jayden suprizes me everyday with something new and cute. He makes me laugh.He is a strong little man. He is my buddy.

Meet Tatum Nicole

Okay so Tatum is who I call "Little Momma". Ever since she was born she was very independent. And as soon as she got her little brother, she has played momma. Not that I am not doing my job as mom, but Tatum looks after him and watches his every move. It amaaaazzzes me how much she loves her brother and would do anything for him. She makes sure he get to bed with a pull-up and with his teeth brushed. She makes sure he is all tucked in. About a month ago my job has a picnic, everyone there was telling me how she would go over to Jayden asking him where his shoes were and to be careful. My co workers told me she would not let him out of her sights. I think that this is most wonderful thing someone could do for there siblings. It makes me think that they will grow up and be so close and will be there for each other as adults. Oh and if Jay gets in trouble, can you guess who he goes running to..........yep his sissy.

Okay on another subject of Tatum. Tatum is 7 years old and will be 8 in November. She has just started the 2nd grade. Now here teacher is Ms. Freda Ruston. She use to be my Math teacher in 7th grade. So Tatum is excited about have a teacher that use to be mom's teacher. She wants to be like me, but I won't let her. Tatum will do anything you ask her to do....well she won't really do what I say, but then again who listens to their mother and father anyway....lol, love you mom and dad.

Just getting Started

Okay so bear with me as We get this thing going, I love doing things with the kids. This past weekend we (bobby, Carolyn and Larry(in-laws)) took the kids to the park. we went on trails, took pictures and played. The day was great though tatum kept crying because she just wanted to play, she didn't want the walk the trails like every one eles. And when we finally stopped to play, she played for just about 10 min and was ready to go.